Following University of Florida Quarterback Tim Tebow's historic Heisman win Saturday night, Jesus Christ, savior of the world, held a press conference in Gainesville to discuss his role in Tebow's victory.
"We watched a lot of tape," Christ said.
Christ said he began working with Tebow on the field over the summer, concentrating on his 7-step drop in the pocket and the angle of his throwing arm at the point of release.
"Last year, Timmy had a tendency to kinda sling the ball when he needed to get it into a tight spot," Christ said. "I told him, 'Keep your arm up, kid. And I'll make sure the ball gets where it needs to go.'"
Christ said that Tebow has been praying to get more game time since his freshman season in 2006, where he was relegated to mostly 3rd Down situations behind Quarterback Chris Leak. But at the time, Christ had not yet reconciled his well publicized dispute with Florida Head Coach Urban Meyer.
Ever since Meyer took over as head coach in 2005, Christ has viewed him as a competitor for worship in the Gainesville area, where many residents have been known to treat the former Utah coach with religious deference.
"It's not like he can walk on water," a bitter Christ was quoted as saying in a 2005 Gainesville Sun expose on the riff between the two men. But he has forgiven Meyer (and given his previous statements over the past 2000 years, that was of little surprise), and now the two work amicably together.
Christ made the decision to leave the pros following many years of helping other southern, white quarterbacks like Jon Kitna and Peyton Manning. And he's not shy about the role he played in their success, either.
"Seriously, those guys couldn't have done it without me," he said.
As for Tebow, Christ said he couldn't imagine working with another player.
"I mean, c'mon. He runs, he passes, he gets good grades in school," Christ said. "And he worships me like a god."